Sunday, November 11, 2012

Tulisan Tanpa Harapan

Apabila mengharapkan diri kita bahagia, tak semestinya berakhir dengan apa yang diharapkan. Ungkapan janji tinggal janji cukup dramatik tapi apabila berkata tentangnya, mungkin berlaku kepada orang lain. Tak perlu memikirkan soalnya, kecuali suatu hari kita berdepan dengan situasi ini.

Manusia bertindak, melakukan apa yang dirasakan patut. Sama ada perlu, atau harus berlaku, pada mereka asal berkenan di hati mengapa perlu ditangguhkan. Perkara yang tidak ada penghalang semuanya didorong oleh perasaan. Begitu berkuasa perasaan itu, tidak bisa dihalang tembok batu. Jika mereka mahu, sesukar manapun mereka tetap dengan keputusan itu.

Apa yang perlu anda buat? Tak perlu berbuat apa. Biarkan diri anda menjadi orang bodoh yang akan terus diperbodohkan berkali-kali. Kini anda sedar betapa bodohnya mempercayai akan suatu janji, yang akhihrnya diri anda yang disakiti. Penyesalan bukan penyelesaian.

Apa yang anda perlu sedar? Hati manusia berubah. Hati manusia lebih kejam berbanding apa yang disangkakan. Hati, bukan mudah dijaga, sekali parut hitam lama cuba dipadamkan, sampai masanya ia muncul kembali. Siapa diri anda untuk orang lain menjaga perasaan anda? Jika perasaan anda bukan lagi keutamaan baginya, tentu perasaannya terhadap anda juga telah tiada. Anda hanya seorang manusia yang tiba-tiba berhenti berjalan kaki dan berdiri di tengah khalayak umum di sebuah lorong pejalan kaki.

Berdiri mengadap luar, rasakan apa yang diberitahu oleh hati anda. Jika perkara yang paling dilarang tetap terjadi tanpa anda tiada hak menghalangnya, mungkin anda harus menyedari akan hakikat sebenarnya. Kalau dulu pernah terjadi, kini akan berulang lagi, dengan sengaja dan terancang, janganlah mengharap lagi. Sayang bukan bererti memiliki, kerana sayang manusia berlalu pergi. Manusia mempunyai ideologi, tanpa keterpaksaan, apa yang dibuat amat menunjukkan niat dan kehendak dirinya. Satu-satunya hak anda dalam situasi ini adalah untuk tidak diganggu lagi. Selamat bercuti.


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